I once heard a travel enthusiast share this story:  “I was supposed to visit Place A, but after one unexpected twist after another, I ended up going to Place B instead. All the research I had done for days went to waste—yet somehow, it turned into an unforgettable journey.”  I always wondered: could such a thing really happen?  Well, never say never.  On our final day in Kaunas, Lithuania, Charles and I experienced exactly that—courtesy of God’s own arrangement.

 Charles said, “The exhibition has come to a successful close. Let’s celebrate by visiting a local attraction.”  As always, being utterly devoted to my master, I naturally nodded in agreement.

Without further ado, he searched online and found a medieval historic site—complete with city walls, fortifications and defensive tunnels. I still remember how the sun smiled upon us throughout the journey.  Charles glanced at the navigation and laughed. “The round trip could easily take four hours. Are you OK?”  I nodded again.  I’ve always believed that while the body and spirit are still young and the feet still nimble, we should walk as much as we can!

When we finally arrived, something felt strange. There was hardly a soul around.  We walked up toward the hill and reached the old walls. But why were they so wildly overgrown with weeds?  Just as the question marks in my head were piling up, a man appeared in the distance and asked what we were doing there.  Charles replied, “We’re here to see the historic site.”  He explained, “This place was sold to a private organization four years ago. You’re not allowed in without special permission.”  Oops!  So the website simply hadn’t been updated.  We had been misled—and had walked all that way for nothing. 

Charles frowned.  I immediately comforted him: “Never mind. This little town has such an old-world charm. Wandering around aimlessly is lovely too.”  And so, the two of us began wandering with absolutely no destination in mind.  Whenever we spotted a yellow house or an unusual wall, we would stop for a few photos. We wandered and drifted until, suddenly, I stopped in front of a private residence.  “Wow! Look at those birch trees. They’re beautiful!”

Before Charles could even respond, I had already hopped over to the birch tree, gently touching its trunk and saying hello.

“Private property. Please don’t wander into people’s homes,” Charles warned.  “The gate is open!” I protested. “And yes, why is the door open? What exactly is this place?”  He replied rather helplessly, “Miss, this is my first time here too. You ask me—who am I supposed to ask?”

Only then did we notice an information plaque beside the entrance.  It read:

The Former Residence and Museum of Juozas Grušas, a Nationally Celebrated Lithuanian Writer.

Charles murmured, “I remember the travel guide mentioning this famous writer’s home. So this is where it is!”  I was over the moon.  I immediately rang the bell.  Before long, a guide opened the door, and we eagerly slipped inside to hear the story.  The moment I entered, I was deeply drawn to the quiet, almost magnetic atmosphere.  Our guide warmly explained, “This is the desk where the great writer did his writing. Those operas that were hugely popular in his time were all written by him. He was so beloved by the Lithuanian people that his former home has been preserved as a national cultural heritage site.”

My heart quietly responded: “I love writing. Perhaps that’s why some invisible hand somehow led me here. Although this house carries such a long history, the atmosphere of writing—and this profound stillness—feels so familiar. So very familiar. It is almost as if, somewhere in the unseen, I can still feel the writer’s love for putting pen to paper.”

She then took us through the dining room, living room, bedroom and other parts of the house, explaining everything in detail.  “This television was quite a fashionable gadget in its day. You had to press buttons manually to adjust the red, green and blue colors on the screen.  And look at this ingenious furnace. You put the firewood in from this side, and the whole house would quickly warm up. The compartment above was almost like a modern microwave—it was used to warm up food!”  The more enthusiastically she explained, the more excited I became, firing off questions one after another.

Eventually, when she couldn’t answer one of them, she jokingly said, “I wasn’t around in that era either. I only know what has been passed down by those who came after him.”  Charles immediately jumped in: “She just happens to love writing, so she’s endlessly curious. Please don’t mind her!”  The guide laughed.  “Not at all! It’s wonderful that you’re so interested and keep asking questions. My afternoons here are usually so quiet. It’s lovely to have someone to chat with!”

It turned out that she had been stationed there for more than two years. With relatively few visitors during quiet periods, she was delighted to have two people who were genuinely interested and happy to chat.  Her heart bloomed with joy.  And naturally, you guessed it—we simply had to take a photo together.  Click.  The shutter sounded, and something clicked inside my heart too.

I suddenly understood.  We hadn’t been meant to visit that historic site at all.  The whole detour had simply been paving the way for us to discover this writer’s former home.  Ah…So this was the real destination all along.  We had experienced it for ourselves:

You set out for Place A, only to be unexpectedly led to Place B.  And this God-sent surprise?  Absolutely brilliant. Simply a stroke of genius!

曾聽一旅遊達人分享：「本要赴A地，孰料連番周折下卻改到B點。連日的資料搜集前功盡棄，但卻收獲難忘旅程。」始終狐疑世上焉有此種事？哼，話永遠別說得太早。今回於立陶宛「考納斯」，離開前一天，即天送我倆親歷之。Charles 說：「展覽圓滿結束，順道遊當地名勝慶祝吧。」我這一向效忠主人的自然點頭和應。他二話不說網搜到一中世紀古蹟，就是有城牆、有炮台防風洞這種。猶記得，出行日太陽一路賞面。Charles 笑曰：「按導航指示來回動輒四句鐘，沒問題嗎？」我依舊點頭和應。一直抱持著身心尚年輕，腳爪利索便盡量走走吧。

來到目的地，奇怪人蹟罕至。朝山頭走至城牆，奇怪何解亂草叢生？當心頭問號疊加，遠遠盪來一男士。他詢問我倆所為何事。Charles 回：「觀光看古蹟。」他解說：「這裡自四年前已轉售私營機構，沒特許証不得入內。」哎呀，原來網站沒更新。我們被誤導，白走一趟。

Charles 鎖眉，我即安慰：「沒關係，小鎮蠻有古樸風味。隨便蹓躂也很好。」就這我倆即漫無目的盪呀盪。看到黃色小屋或別緻圍牆速來擺拍一番。逛著飄著，忽爾駐足一民居前。我讚嘆：「嘩，這家白樺樹好美！」Charles 還未回話，我已跳至白樺前撫樹幹打招呼。「私家重地，勿亂闖民居。」我喊話：「門前圍欄開著嘛，對啦，何解門打開？這裡啥地方？」他沒好氣：「小姐，我也首趟到訪。你問我、我問誰？」

漸漸才看到門亭介紹牌刻道：國家級作家「尤奧扎斯‧格魯沙斯」故居博物館。Charles 喃喃說：「旅遊介紹有提及這大作家故居，原來在這。」我歡喜若狂，立馬按鈴。未幾一導賞員應門，我們隨即鑽入屋聽故事。甫入內，頓時被靜謐磁場深深吸引。導賞姐姐熱情介紹：大作家就是於這書桌創作的、當年紅極一時的歌劇全出自他手筆；因他深受國民愛戴，故其原居地被列為國家文物收藏至今。我心和應：「我愛寫作，才神推鬼送牽進來。雖故居歷史悠久，可寫作氛圍及這種靜很熟悉、很熟悉。彷彿虛空中仍能感受到作家對執筆之熱愛。」

她遂領我們細看其飯廳、客廳、卧室等並作詳細解說。「這台電視機算是當年時尚玩意。螢幕上紅綠藍色需人手按鈕來調呢。暖爐設計亦妙絕，你這邊推進木柴，樓房瞬間暖開來。上面暗架直像現今微波爐，用以回溫食物呀。」看她越聊越起勁，我雀躍地胡亂提問。至她答不來時打趣說：「我亦非這時代的人，只聽其後人傳誦罷了。」男友搶腔：「剛巧她愛寫東西，才好奇不絕，請莫見怪。」她笑言：「沒事，幸你們有興趣問呀問，我向來的沉悶午後難得添樂呢。」

原來她駐守這逾兩年，閒時旅客不多，難得我倆多好聊，她心開滿花。最終，你猜對了，自然是難得來張合照啦。咔嚓一響敲我心田：明白了，遊不到古蹟，實則早為訪這作家故居埋伏筆。嗯，體驗到了：遊A地卻誤打誤撞到B地，這天送驚喜才真……拍案叫絕！

To fall in love at first sight—there is simply no way to explain it or analyze it. That first intuitive feeling, untouched by concepts and unclouded by thought, often brings us closer to our truest selves.  For me, that is exactly how I feel about Van Gogh’s work. I had already fallen deeply in love with his paintings long before I met my artist boyfriend. Whenever life felt difficult, just one glance at that radiant “yellow” in his paintings would somehow awaken an indescribable warmth within me.  Perhaps those who have seen Van Gogh’s sunflowers feel the same way. Like me, they may have developed an irresistible love for vivid yellow and the sun ever since. To me, the two mirror and illuminate each other, symbolizing two elements indispensable to life. What are they? Light and love!

Of course, this is merely my own personal interpretation of why I have been so captivated by Van Gogh since childhood. And now, finally, I have had the chance to visit the land of my dear Van Gogh and come face to face with his sunflowers. You can probably imagine the sheer exhilaration in my heart!

I still remember walking into the exhibition hall that day and finding it absolutely packed. From lively primary school children to silver-haired seniors, every visitor seemed spellbound, gazing at the paintings in utter fascination. Wherever a crowd had gathered, you could bet there was one of Van Gogh’s world-famous masterpieces. Everyone was eagerly taking photos and checking in with the paintings.  To get up close to all my favorite works, I could probably have spent the entire day there and still considered it a day well spent. A childhood dream had finally come true, and I was simply ecstatic. 

Charles, however, had a rather complicated expression on his face. He sighed, “A superstar of this magnitude sold almost none of his paintings during his lifetime. He was practically a struggling artist. He devoted his whole life to painting, yet no one seemed to care while he was alive. And look at today… More than a century later, everyone is scrambling to buy his souvenir. Even a Van Gogh sunflower T-shirt can cost dozens of euros. Isn’t the world completely upside down?”

I couldn't agree more, “Exactly! There’s a saying that has long circulated in the art world: An artist 's work sometimes has to wait until the artist has ‘departed this world’ before its value soars. Well, at least it’s something. After a lifetime of quietly devoting themselves to their craft, perhaps artists eventually manage to accumulate a little of that ‘belated glory’!”  Charles continued, “In terms of painting technique, Van Gogh may have been fairly ordinary. But the truth in his painting—the sincerity in every single brushstroke—was truly unparalleled. It was precisely this truthfulness of his, free from exaggeration and affectation, that went straight to people’s hearts! That is probably why his paintings have remained timeless. And look at his subjects. He often painted ordinary, seemingly insignificant things around him, quite unlike the luxurious subjects created by artists of his time who catered to the tastes of royalty and aristocracy. No wonder his work went largely unappreciated back then! I wonder, if he could see what is happening today, would he laugh or cry?”

I chimed in, “I’ve always been fascinated by sunflowers, but what I gained today was something far deeper—an indescribable sense of being moved. Especially when I stood before The Sower. I kept looking at it again and again… simply gazing, almost stunned into a meditative stillness. Beneath the blazing golden sun, the farmer simply keeps sowing seeds of ‘Hope.’ It feels like a reflection of Van Gogh’s unwavering faith in new life.  Even when life was full of hardship, the moment he stood before the canvas and painted from the flow of his heart, his life itself seemed to come alive!

On the journey home, one sentence by Van Gogh that I had seen in the exhibition kept replaying in my mind, “In art, one must give heart and soul.”  Van Gogh truly was a born artist. His original heart and soul were pure and undefiled; he expressed his love so genuinely upon the canvas. His rich colors, combined with those gentle, flowing lines, radiate warmth and vitality.

Oh, deep inside, I felt as though something had been set ablaze. Happiness overflowed.  Almost unconsciously, I closed my eyes, smiled from the heart, and brought my palms together:  A heartfelt salute to Van Gogh—this sincere, soulful, simple man.

And suddenly, I understood, “That once-overlooked artist eventually touched the hearts of people all over the world.  All because he was true.  A True Heart…… Is Everything!”

Happy sharing Short video…

https://youtu.be/lCbYkQm63Sk?si=stI7wlqGsPiqLugG

光看一眼即愛上，這解釋不來、分析不了；就是這直覺、沒參雜任何概念、沒經思考的第一感，往往更貼近真實的自己。於我而言，喜歡「梵高」的作品，就是以上之描述。早於結識藝術家男友前，已深深愛上。但凡困頓時看一眼他畫中的這抹「黃」，竟萌生說不出的暖意。可能看過梵高向日葵的親們，也如我這般，從此酷愛「艷黃」與「太陽」。因兩者互相輝映地象徵著生命中不可或缺之重要原素。是啥？光與愛呀！當然，這只是我自小對梵高情有獨鍾的個人解讀。時至今天，終能親臨梵兄故鄉，遂走近他的向日葵；我心之澎湃極樂，你或可想而知吧。

猶記得當天甫進展館，盡見人山人海。捧場粉絲無論是活潑小學生，抑或是雙鬢斑白的長者，位位像著了魔般看得如癡如醉。但凡圍上堆堆人兒的，料必屬梵兄世界級的名畫。人人爭相與名畫合照打卡。故要近距離觀摩所有心頭好，還真要耗上一整天才叫功德圓滿。我兒時夢想得以一償夙願，盡是歡喜若狂。可Charles臉上卻聚滿複雜情愫。他感慨道：「這號大咖人物，生前几近沒畫作卖出；堪稱潦倒畫家。他畢生醉心畫畫，可在世時無人問津。百多年後的今天，你看…人人忘我搶購其精品。光是向日葵T恤竟要幾十歐元。世間是否有夠顛倒？」我深有同感：「對呀，藝術界一直流傳佳話：同一幅作品，務必待你駕鶴西去，才漲價不菲。嗯，還好啦，藝術家窮一生在默默耕耘，最終算是攢到些『遲來的輝煌』吧！」

Charles 強調：「以繪畫技術而論，可能蛮一般。但梵高作畫的真、就是這一筆一筆的真誠，確是舉世無雙。正正是他這份真、不浮誇、不造作，直達人心！這大概就是其畫作歷久彌新的原因。且你看，梵高總愛以身邊很多不起眼之平常物作題材，而與當時人人為追捧皇室貴族而畫的奢侈品，恰恰大相逕庭。故只落得沒人欣賞之下場！唉，不知他在天之靈看到現況，會否啼笑皆非？」

我接腔：「我向來著迷向日葵，可今天收獲的更是說不出的觸動。尤其面對『播種者』這名畫，我一看再看……怔怔在看、心神攝震入定般。於金黃太陽直照下，農民只管不斷播下『希望』種子。是梵兄對新生抱持堅定信念之寫照吧。即便生活多拮据，只要立於畫布前心流作畫，他的生命即頃刻活起來！」

回程時，心底不斷倒帶展館內梵高一名言： “In art, one must give heart and soul” 梵高確是天生藝術家，他的初心與靈魂盡是純粹無染，他把愛真切表達於畫布上。其豐盈色調結合柔婉線條，予人溫暖與生命力。喔，我內心深處直像被點燃開來，幸福滿溢。不經意合上眼、會心微笑、雙手合十：向這真心靈魂、質樸的梵高兄致敬！忽爾悟了：當年的笨拙匠人，終究能感動世人。全因真……就是一切！

PS. 附美美短視頻

https://youtu.be/lCbYkQm63Sk?si=YGoB6IVdCBG8yC-J

A friend once asked me, “How come whenever you venture into some unfamiliar foreign land, everything seems to go your way? What’s your secret?”  I burst out laughing. “Not at all! It’s not as though everything always goes smoothly. It’s just that whenever something doesn’t go my way, I simply take a detour and shake it off. There is hardly enough time to focus on and savor all the beautiful scenery along the way, so how could I possibly waste a moment mourning over so-called disappointments? I believe that ‘everything happens for a reason.’ So I simply never linger—I keep my head up and walk forward.”  My friend stared at me with wide, astonished eyes. I continued, “You seem determined not to let me off without a real-life example. Fine, then. Let me share this ‘came away empty-handed’ episode in the Netherlands.”

Before heading to Lithuania for our
exhibition, we arrived in the Netherlands a week early to meet with a gallery
and discuss a possible collaboration. I still remember meeting the gallery
owner at the end of July. This entrepreneur was quite interested in our Frost
Flowers global exhibition, so we agreed to meet again at the end of August to
discuss the details of working together.  Naturally, she was also interested in representing Charles’s oil paintings. So, once the Lithuania exhibition was completed, Charles immediately set to work, creating two new paintings specifically for the entrepreneur to consider for representation. Watching him paint so completely absorbed in his work, I was thrilled when the finished pieces turned out beautifully. A selfish little thought suddenly popped into my head: “Do we really have to give them to the entrepreneur?”

Charles, ever the bigger-picture thinker, reassured me, “If this helps build a friendship, of course we should offer our finest work. Besides, curating the Frost Flowers exhibition is the main mission. We have to think of the bigger picture—don’t be so small-minded!”  And so, carrying the two beautiful paintings, we went from shop to shop looking for a place to have them framed. Being strangers in a foreign land, the two of us were like “headless flies,” and it took quite a bit of effort before we finally got everything sorted. 

When the day of our appointment arrived, we proudly showed the beautiful paintings to the entrepreneur. She glanced at them, offered a few words of praise, and then simply set them aside. She instructed her assistant to go through the exhibition and collaboration terms in details.  Then came the shock. Some of the terms sounded rather like “asking for the moon”! Although taken aback, Charles remained completely professional and continued to have a sincere discussion with her. He went on to cite examples of our previous collaborations with organizations in different places, as well as the operating models of other galleries representing his work, for her consideration. 

Unfortunately, her perspective as well as her magnetic field was completely different from ours. I immediately understood: she saw art primarily as a high-end product to be marketed for profit, whereas the purpose behind our Frost Flowers exhibitions was simply not on the same wavelength. Alas, the facts spoke for themselves: we had simply knocked on the wrong door.
Different paths, different purposes.
That was all it was. We politely wrapped things up, retrieved our beautiful
paintings, and slipped away.

Charles looked visibly deflated. After all that work, it was only natural that he felt disappointed. I quickly comforted him: “Business is never easy. She has her own difficulties too. We’ve done our best—that’s good enough. Let’s let it go and go have some fun.”  With that, I took one big step onto the street.  “Wow! When we passed by earlier, there was a whole line of people waiting to get in. What on earth is this place?” I grabbed the still-gloomy Charles and headed straight toward the queue.  The moment we reached the entrance, the security guard looked at me and said, “You seem like a pretty cheerful lady…”  Charles suddenly perked up and happily jumped in: “She’s always like this. This place is…” 

The kindly guard seemed to take an instant liking to us. Smiling, he explained, “This is a church that’s over four hundred years old. It happens to be open to the public for free today. You two are in luck! Just remember to be quiet and respectful.”  I smiled broadly. “Absolutely!”
And in my heart, one thought instantly floated up: There you have it—every cloud has a silver lining…

Wow… Passing through a single doorway from the noisy street outside, it felt as though I had suddenly fallen into a cool, tranquil pool. All my burdens were washed away.  I smiled and said, “Maybe God knew I couldn’t bear to part with those two beautiful paintings, so the collaboration had to fall through. Ha-ha!”  That finally made him laugh.  Still smiling, I said, “How can life always go exactly as we wish? At least stumbling upon this ancient church by chance is a consolation prize from God. Since we’ve been given the chance to come inside and pay a visit to Brother Jesus, we might as well make a sincere wish.”

And the happier I am when I make a wish, the more powerful it must be! On our way back, I received some very happy news: the organizations in Brazil and Thailand that we had contacted earlier had just agreed to our requests… Our exhibitions for 2027 were officially confirmed!

No wonder things didn’t work out in the Netherlands. It really was a case of “a blessing in disguise”—just as the old saying goes: sometimes a Loss turns out to be a Gain!

朋友問：「何解跳進陌生異鄉皆像到哪也事事順遂，究竟你有啥秘技？」我大笑回話：「哪有？也不見得萬事大吉呀。只是一貫不順心的，拐個彎我就甩掉之。一路好風景要聚焦欣賞也來不及，焉有閒情憑弔所謂之憾事？『一切自有安排』，自然一刻也不停留，昂首邁步向前咯。」朋友杏眼圓睜瞪我，我接腔：「彷彿不撈實例說明，你像誓不甘休。那就分享荷蘭這『食白果』個案吧。」

話說這回赴立陶宛辦展前，我們提前一週到訪荷蘭與某畫廊洽談。猶記得七月底與其老闆會晤時，這企業家對冰花巡展蠻感興趣，遂約定八月底再共聚談合作細則。當然，她同時亦希望能代理男友的油畫。於是，完成立陶宛展覽後，Charles 馬上就地取材，創作兩幅新作，打算予企業家作代理。看他忘我揮筆，最終奪目產物眼前一亮。我竟冒出獨霸的餿主意：「真要給企業家嗎？」

Charles 心明大義，安慰曰：「能結邦交，自當奉上極品嘛。且策展冰花才是重頭戲，大局為重，不要小家子啦！」就這樣，拿穩兩幅美畫再四出找店舖裱框。始終人地生疏，我倆「盲頭蒼蠅」著實花了不少功夫才辦妥。來到應約那天，當展示美美畫作予企業家時，她瞥眼看後稱讚數句即擱一旁。逐令助手細讀設展與合作條款。驟聽有點「獅子大開口」！雖頓感錯愕，男友還是相當專業地與企業家真誠交流。Charles 遂列舉過往各地合作團體的佐證與其他畫廊代理的營運模式予企業家參考。無奈她立場乃至磁場均與咱們大相徑庭。我登時心裡明白：企業家把藝術視為高端產物來謀利，自然與我們辦冰花展的初心不在同一頻道上！唉，事實說明：摸錯門路。

道不同不相為謀，彼此目標各異而已。我倆匆匆打圓場、拔回美畫溜之大吉。男友黯然失色，白忙一場難免洩氣。我速開解：「生意難做。她也不容易。盡過力便好，放下去玩吧。」一個箭步躍上大街。「嘩，來時路過見人龍排隊入內。究竟啥玩意？」我拉著悶悶不樂的他朝人龍奔去。門口警衛一看我說：「小姐看來蠻開心的…」Charles 頓時清醒，高興搶話：「她一向如此，這裡是……」警衛叔叔像超喜歡我倆，笑笑曰：「這所逾四百年古教堂，今天免費開放供民眾觀賞，你們走運啦，記得要安靜守禮。」我笑開眉：「一定一定。」心中飛升一句：塞翁失馬……

嘩，從喧鬧大街穿過一扇門，像瞬間跌入清涼池，煩心盡洗。我莞爾：「大概老天爺體恤我捨不得兩畫，故合作泡湯。哈哈！」他終被我逗笑。我照樣開心曰：「世事焉能盡如人意？但能無意中遊覽古教堂，算是上天饋贈的安慰獎。反正能入內拜訪耶穌哥，就誠心許願吧。」

開心我開心許願就更靈驗！回程時收到開心訊息：早前去信的巴西與泰國兩地，剛巧應允我們要求…… 2027辦展落實啦。難怪荷蘭談不來，真的應驗：塞翁失馬之說咯！

They say a broken childhood can take a lifetime to repair or heal. I’m not so sure. Of course, that is simply my personal view. Hmm… even if everyone agrees that I was handed a rather unglamorous script for life, I can still choose, right here in the present moment, to rewrite the less-than-beautiful version and give even the ugliest parts of my childhood a fresh new look. Why not? Mindset determines everything. It’s my world, and I’m the one who gets to write it!

Speaking of which, when I was little, whenever I stayed with one family or another in an effort to please the adults, the very first thing I would do was put on an apron and start helping with the chores. Once the host saw how hardworking and capable I was, they would naturally be happy to let me stay a little longer. And there it was — the habit was formed. From my early teens onward, whenever I stayed in another country, whether at a close friend’s home or with an older relative, I would naturally head straight for the kitchen, put on an apron, and start cooking and washing up together with everyone else.

“Oh dear, you’re a guest. How can we let you work?” I would immediately reply, “It’s okay. I just can’t seem to shake this strange apron habit of mine. Besides, it’s more fun when the whole family works together!” Childhood trauma? None. I had long since transformed it into the wonderful magic of becoming “one family.”

And so, when I stepped into Ziboliškės village of Lithuania this time, once I had settled in, I wasted no time putting on an apron and getting busy with this and that. Ruta was equally taken aback: “But you came here as a guest…” I quickly cut in, “But I love sneaking into the kitchen even more!”

She smiled and casually pointed toward the corner of the room. “All right then. I hear you’ve developed some pretty decent baking skills. We’ve just harvested these from the fields. Let’s see what delicious thing you can make with them!”

I took one look and my heart leapt. “This is my first time seeing a yellow one! The ones in Canada and Hong Kong are all green. Maybe I can make some kind of bread or cake with it. Let me give it a try.”

With a new mission in hand, I immediately went online and searched through a pile of zucchini-bread recipes to study. Oh dear — everything in this new place was unfamiliar: the ingredients, the utensils, the measuring cups, even the oven. Baking requires precise measurements, yet numbers and calculations have always been my fatal weakness. I felt much safer having a male assistant around to help with the math. And so, I invited Esau to bake a cake with me.

Esau said frankly, “Miss, I hardly ever go into the kitchen. Baking really isn’t my area.”

I immediately reassured him, “Don’t worry. You just help me with the calculations. This is my first time trying it too. As long as we put our hearts into it, we’ll be fine.”

Following an online tutorial, I kept throwing questions his way: “How many grams is two-thirds of a cup? And how do we convert the flour in this recipe to this whole-wheat flour?”

Luckily, he was there. Really, having someone to discuss things with made me feel much more at ease.

Then came the moment to put the cake into the oven, and I almost let my mind wander. I confidently declared, “Put it on the middle rack and bake for one hour. It’ll be foolproof. But something’s strange — why does this oven only go up to a little over 200 degrees?”

Esau looked puzzled. “That’s true. My mom’s oven is similar. She says that’s pretty normal.”

Standing there in front of the oven, I gathered my thoughts. Less than ten seconds later, a thought suddenly flashed through my mind: “Oh! My oven at home uses Fahrenheit. Could this one be Celsius?”

We looked at each other — and immediately corrected the setting. Thank goodness I realized it in time; otherwise, after an hour in the oven, the cake would have turned into biscuits!

At last, the fragrant zucchini cake was successfully born. Wow — what a relief! Thank goodness Esau was there to lend a hand, or I might not have made it to the finish line. And when I saw everyone eating with beaming smiles, I couldn’t help but laugh. My first attempt at baking in a foreign country had somehow passed the test amid all that chaos. What an adventure!

Before leaving, I asked Ruta if I could keep the apron. She agreed and gave it to me. Why? Because I had already formed a special bond with this beautiful stretch of Lithuania, and I wanted the apron to accompany me and carry that connection forward wherever I went.

Yes, whenever I find myself thinking fondly of a particular country, there is no better way to revisit it than by making its local food. Thinking of Shanghai, I make shengjian bao; thinking of Hong Kong, egg tarts, of course. And Lithuania… here comes its traditional national dessert, Tinginys — the “Lazy Cake”!

I had tried it once or twice at cafés in Lithuania, and after returning to Canada, I decided to learn how to make it myself online. Haha! Putting on Ruta’s Lithuanian apron made me feel even more immersed in the local spirit, and I had even more fun making it, with a smile on my face the whole time. Every bite tasted sweet all the way to my heart — all because one apron connects two places, and one sweet treat connects our hearts.

https://youtu.be/EoVNsE197DI?si=TA49QNJQUynDBxjG

聽說破碎童年要花一生來修復或治癒，我猜不一定吧。當然，這只是我個人立場。嗯，即便大家公認我領了不太光鮮的人生劇本，我還是可以「當下」把不堪版本「改好」、多難看的童年我仍有能力將之翻新，為何不？心態決定一切，我的世界我做主嘛！

話說小時候為討大人喜，入住哪家哪戶，第一時間即掛上圍裙幹活。主人見我勤勞精靈，必收留我久些。好了，習慣養成。打從十來歲滾動開來，但凡住進哪國家，不管是閨密或長輩家，自當奔廚房穿圍裙一同煮呀洗呀。「哎呀，你是客人，怎能勞駕？」我即回話：「沒事，我這穿圍裙怪癖戒不掉， 一家人幹活開心嘛。」童年陰影？沒有，早已轉化為「一家親」之妙用咯。

誠如今回踏進立陶宛古村，安頓後二話不說牽圍裙一穿即忙這忙那。Ruta 同樣錯愕：「你是來當客人的…」我搶話：「但我更愛鑽廚房！」她笑笑順手指向牆角：「好吧，聽說你練就了不錯的烘焙技巧，剛從田野收割回來這瓜，看你能弄啥美味的？」一看心雀躍：「首回見識到有黃色的瓜，我加國或香港全綠綠的，好像能弄麵包或蛋糕之類，我試試看。」拿到新任務，我速網搜一堆「西葫蘆麵包」配方來研究。唉，新地方、原材料、器皿、量杯、烤箱全挺陌生。數據量度要精準呢，可我致命弱項就是數字跟運算。找個男助手幫忙一下較安心。就這邀請 Esau 一同來焗蛋糕吧。

Esau直言：「小姐，我鮮進廚房，烘焙事非我範圍。」我即安慰：「不怕，你幫我計算即可。我也是首回嘗試，我倆用心做便是了。」看網上教學，我不時掉問題予他：「三分之二杯等於多少克？配方用的麵粉跟這全麥粉怎換算？」幸有他在，真的，有商有量，心也穩了不少。來到進烤箱時，差點開小差。我篤定說：「放中層焗一小時必萬無一失。可就是奇怪，何解這家烤箱最高只二百來度？」Esau 狐疑：「是呀，我老媽家這台也類近，她說一般也如此。」杵烤箱前定下心神，不到十秒一念湧出：「哎呀，我家用華氏，這家二百多會否攝氏？」你眼望我眼，登時修正。還好醒悟及時，否則烤一小時蛋糕變餅乾啦！最後，香噴噴西葫蘆蛋糕順利誕生。嘩，真抹一把汗！幸虧 Esau 助陣才大功告成。 最後，見人人吃得眉開眼笑，首趟異國烘焙能於慌亂中達標，多驚險呀！離開前徵得 Ruta 同意，把圍裙贈我。何以故？心繫立陶宛這一段情，寄意圍裙一路伴我延下去。

是的，每當想起某心儀國度，弄當地美食最好不過。念上海就弄生煎包、念香港烤蛋撻是也；那麼立陶宛…其傳統國民甜點「Tinginys ~懶人蛋糕」來啦。於當地咖啡廳嘗過一兩回，決意回加照樣網上學。哈哈，穿上Ruta 這立陶宛圍裙，盡感當地風情，弄得更起勁，做的當下咀角上揚。嚼每口盡甜入心，全因：一條圍裙繫兩地，一款甜點心相連。

附「Tinginys 教學短視頻」供參考。

https://youtu.be/EoVNsE197DI?si=rmaDFaTElJSkO96b

That day, as I walked along the streets of Lithuania, I looked up at the white clouds smiling as they welcomed me and waved me on my way, and my heart was warmed. Big Sister Cloud gently nudged open the vault of my memories, and in an instant I was transported back to those delightful days in 2018, when I had ventured alone into a foreign land.

Along the way, people would often ask me, “Why are you here all by yourself?” I would burst out laughing and reply, “Simply to keep a promise! A promise I made to a friend ten years ago.” And so, I began telling the story.  Back in 2008, I went
to South India to attend a yoga course. During afternoon tea, I volunteered as
a “tea server,” serving tea to teachers and students throughout the school.  Ruta was my partner in this little mission.

For an entire month, the two of us happily carried our teapots around, pouring tea, chatting, laughing—and, along the way, began a beautiful friendship. When I left India, Ruta simply introduced herself: “I’m from Lithuania in Europe. You are welcome to come and visit me.”  Then, one day ten years later, that familiar smiling face suddenly came drifting back into my mind.  I opened my old contact book and tracked down my “tea-serving partner,” with whom I had not spoken for ten years. Then, somewhat audaciously, I sent her a message: “Ruta, do you remember me? I’m coming to visit you!” Her answer was still the same: “You are always welcome.” And just like that, I shouldered my big backpack and flied to her country.

We had been out of touch for ten years, so I knew nothing about Ruta’s life at that time. Just before I arrived in Lithuania, she informed me that she had suddenly been called away on a business trip. That meant I would have to explore on my own for several days while waiting for her return.  And so, my story with Lithuania officially opened its first chapter in the summer of 2018.

Whenever I wandered around alone, I loved looking up at the sky. Besides Big Sister Cloud, I would often spot smiling little angels perched on the rooftops of buildings, schools, and railway stations. Wow! Every time I saw them, my heart filled with joy. It felt as though angels were everywhere, watching over me, showing me the way, and cheering me on. 

When I finally reunited with Ruta, I immediately asked her about them. She explained, “More than a decade ago, little angels became immensely popular with the public after appearing in an art event. Later, the Mayor placed them at transportation hubs to welcome travelers, and gradually they spread throughout the city. Apparently, there are hundreds of angel sculptures around the city. From then on, the capital acquired another lovely nickname: the City of Angels.”

Now, the camera cuts to the summer of 2026. I returned once again to this Land of Angels. When I stepped into Ziboliškės village, far away from the capital, I thought I would no longer see any trace of them.  However, one day, right in Ruta’s kitchen, I discovered an even more charming and endearing kind of angel!

That day, I was baking in the kitchen. While waiting for the goodies to come out of the oven, my eyes wandered around the room. Suddenly, a certain shade of “yellow” caught my eye. Ruta then told me that this was an angel portrait given to her by Aleksandras Vozbinas (A.V.). After that, I found myself standing before
the angel portrait again and again, quietly absorbed in contemplation.  Still, it was that same touch of yellow that tugged at my heartstrings.

I thought that A.V. had created this adorable angel to watch over this home, this ancient village, this land, and this little paradise. And somehow, I had happened to wander into its presence. This was no coincidence. It was meant to be!

For I gradually heard the angel whisper:
“People will always come and go, but wherever they pass, they leave their footprints behind. Then why is it that, even after generations of sages have passed like the wind, their virtue remains one with Heaven and Earth, shining alongside the sun and moon? Just as the compassionate A.V., devoted his heart to protecting others and loving Heaven and Earth, his spirit deserves to be remembered through the ages and live on forever!"

Somehow, I have been rushing from one place to another in Lithuania, busy with this and that, yet never seem to feel tired. Perhaps I owe it all to the angels everywhere, constantly giving me strength and encouragement.  Or perhaps it is that yellow-haired angel of the great painter A.V. that has remained etched in my heart. This little guardian treasure steadies my spirit and gives me peace of mind.

Hmm… if others are watching over me, then I should do the same in return.

Interestingly, when I first arrived this time, I took a bus from the airport into the city—and found a mobile phone on the bus. Then, when I was leaving Lithuania, I somehow found another mobile phone at the airport check-in counter. Ha-ha! What are the odds? Of course, I handed both phones over to the appropriate lost-and-found department, so that they could make their way back to their rightful owners.

The Land of Angels has taught me this: while being protected by others, we should likewise hold fast to love and sincerity, and keep the positive cycle turning…by protecting the well-being of others!

那天走在立陶宛大街上，看天際白雲迎我送笑，心頭一暖。白雲姐拉我掀開記憶庫，瞬間回到2018年隻身闖異鄉的可愛片段。途中不時被問及何以一人到訪？我大笑回話：「只為應約！應十年前與友人之約。」接續，我開始吐故事。2008年於南印上瑜伽課，下午茶時段當「侍茶員」服務全校師生。而Ruta就是我的並肩拍檔。我倆笑攜茶壺一個月，邊倒茶邊說笑邊開展彼此這份緣！離開印度時，Ruta簡約介紹：「我來自歐洲立陶宛。歡迎你來訪。」於是，十年後某天，這張親切笑臉盪回。我翻開聯絡冊，把這十年沒聊天的「奉茶拍檔」覓出來；再冒昧開腔：「Ruta，你記得我嗎？我來探你呀！」她依舊這句「歡迎你來訪」，如是這，我便扛大背包來了。

十年沒聯繫、Ruta實況全不知情。抵立陶宛前她才通知臨時出差，代表我需自遊行數天等她回來。就這我與立陶宛的故事便於2018年夏正式開卷。當一人蹓躂，我最愛抬頭看天。除白雲姐，還不時看到建築大樓、學校或車站頂坐著笑咪咪天使們。嘩，一看滿心歡喜。像到處皆有天使在保護我，給我引路、為我加油。當與Ruta 會合後，速問原委。她解說：「源於十多年前某藝術活動後小天使廣受民眾喜愛，後來市長將之置交通樞紐歡迎旅客，漸普及開來。據說市內有數百座天使雕塑。首都自此加添一雅號：天使之城。」鏡頭切回至2026年夏，我再訪天使國。當踏入古村，遠離首都，以為再看不到天使踪影。孰料某天於Ruta的廚房，給我發現更迷人討喜的另類天使！

那天在廚房烘焙，等出爐物時目光亂飄；忽被一種「黃」抓住瞳孔。隨後Ruta告知此乃大畫家 Aleksandras Vozbinas (A.V.) 送她的天使畫像。續後不下數回，我皆杵天使肖像前，入定細看。仍是這抹黃牽動心弦。我猜A.V.創作這可愛天使，全為守護這個家、這古村、這片地、這一方樂土。而我剛巧闖進來。此非偶然，而是必然！只因我逐聽到天使說：「人總會走，但途經之處必留下足跡。那何解歷代聖賢即便隨風逝，其德行仍與天地同在、與日月同輝？誠如A.V.仁者，其守護他人與愛天地的心，自當千古傳誦，永垂不朽！」

不知恁地，在立陶宛東奔西跑，忙這忙那也不覺累。大概歸功於無處不在的天使們時刻給力吧。或該是大畫家A.V.這黃髮天使一直烙心田，這護心寶貝穩我心神、予我寬心。嗯，他人守護我，我也照版煮碗呢。有趣是：今回從機場搭公車入城，在公車上拾獲一手機。而離開時於機場登機櫃台，竟弔詭地又給我拾獲手機。哈哈，巧合不？我當然交付專屬部門，讓失物回到主人處。天使國教曉我：被守護的同時，同樣要秉持愛心真心；正向輪轉地……守護他人的福祉！

The Frost Flowers journey has been unfolding since 2023, when Lithuania marked its very first stop. After circling the globe, the seventh stop has brought us right back to where it all began. They say that “seven” is the most sacred number in the ancient civilizations, symbolizing “wholeness, good fortune, and holiness.” So, when we returned to Lithuania to prepare this exhibition, I naturally assumed that, being back in a familiar place with old friends and partners, everything would be easy and well rehearsed. Hah! Only in the end did I truly experience what it means to “go deeper and discover deeper”—yet another extraordinary journey that completely broke with convention.

For exhibitions in other countries, Charles would always rehearse the entire setup in his mind before setting off. This time, however, things were rather different, because he had to create his paintings on site at Ruta’s village within just one week. To exhibit these freshly born paintings alongside the Frost Flowers —wouldn’t that inevitably involve quite a few unknowns? I asked him with some concern, “Wouldn’t it be difficult or stressful to arrive in a new place and have to produce eight or more paintings for the exhibition?”

He smiled and replied, “With Plein-air painting, everything depends on the right time, place, and people. Whether the sky is clear or thunder rolls, really 'God knows'. As for pressure? If you have desires and expectations, if you cling to gains and losses, then pressure naturally follows.”

I immediately chimed in, “Exactly! The ‘Listen to the Water’ joint exhibition is guiding us, step by step, to learn from our great teacher "Water". Water: naturally yielding, flowing with the moment, blending into whatever it encounters. Whatever circumstances arise, we simply learn from water’s softness, humility, and flexibility, and respond accordingly. Water does not seek applause or cling to praise; it simply gives and contributes, allowing the whole to come into being. Wherever we hold an exhibition, we should never forget our original intention. Only then can we truly embody the qualities and nature of water.”

This time, thanks to Ruta’s thoughtful arrangements beforehand, the exhibition was given a venue in the National Museum of Zoology in Kaunas, Lithuania’s second-largest city. I never imagined that we would one day be able to hold an exhibition in this more-than-a-century-old museum! Ruta’s connections and influence, built through her former position as Director of the National Environmental Protection Bureau, were truly remarkable. Every time I thought about this rare honor, my heart filled with gratitude.

But here came the challenge: after completing the paintings in the village, they first had to be exhibited publicly in the village and at a nearby exhibition venue. Only the following day could we rush to Kaunas. That meant we would have to install the exhibition on Saturday morning and hold the opening ceremony at four in the afternoon. This was the original plan arranged by Ruta and the museum director.

Oh dear—installation and opening on the very same day? That was something I had never anticipated! Although we could be considered fairly experienced, we had never conducted an on-site inspection, and exhibition setups always come with unexpected situations. After weighing everything carefully, I still felt uneasy. An inner voice kept encouraging me to “be true”—to speak openly and honestly about what was on my mind. Fortunately, Ruta understood that my concerns came from sincerity and goodwill, and eventually reached an agreement with the museum director. We successfully changed the schedule so that Saturday would be devoted entirely to installation, with the official opening on Sunday afternoon. Thank goodness we managed to make that change, because once we actually arrived and began setting up, we realized even more clearly just how necessary it was!

Alas, the reality was that the museum director was newly appointed and he's not familiar with the exhibition hall. With time running short, Charles became a little frustrated. I quickly reassured him, “He’s just new to the job and doesn’t know much yet. There’s no point blaming him. We’ll figure it out ourselves.” And just like that, Charles, Ruta, and I instantly transformed into the “strongest team.” How should the photographs and paintings be framed? How should the hooks for hanging the paintings be secured? How could we measure the spacing between works accurately? How should the layout be arranged elegantly? How should the lighting be adjusted? … Charles became the commander-in-chief, while Ruta and I, his two little assistants, scrambled to keep up.

Oh, and the artworks still needed titles and printed labels! No problem. I simply named them on the spot, following my intuition, while Ruta quickly printed the labels. Then the two of us worked together, cutting and sticking them onto each piece one by one. Wait a minute—what about the guest book, flowers, and refreshments for the Opening Ceremony? The moment Ruta heard this, off she rushed to get everything ready. How rare it was to see someone who had once held such a senior position without the slightest "hint of official airs", working shoulder to shoulder with us throughout the entire process.

We worked continuously from ten in the morning until five in the afternoon before everything was finally completed. We walked around the exhibition hall and were filled with admiration. It was neither lavish nor ostentatious, yet it was filled with a beautiful resonance of “loving energy.” More than anything, the way the three of us worked so naturally and wholeheartedly together left me deeply touched.

When Opening Ceremony arrived, everything unfolded beautifully. Parents brought their children, who were utterly fascinated by what they saw. And because this was a zoology museum, many school groups will be able to come and admire the dazzling Frost Flowers in the future as well! Never underestimate this simple, heartfelt Opening Ceremony. As we prepared to leave that evening, we took stock of the results: seventeen Frost Flower photographs were exhibited, seven had already been sold; of the ten paintings, four had already found new homes! And all proceeds from the sales this time will be returned to Ruta’s eco-village, giving this ‘Listen to the Water’ joint exhibition an even deeper and more meaningful purpose.

After all the hard work, the three of us exchanged knowing smiles. Everything had come together beautifully, completely and wonderfully.

Yes—the seventh stop brought us back to Lithuania, and only then did I realize that everything had been carrying a profound and far-reaching purpose. This beautiful “return of love,” with its overflowing affection accompanying the Frost Flowers and beautiful paintings, will remain forever in all our hearts. Warm, gentle, and deeply comforting… how wonderful it is!

Videos to share...❤️

https://youtu.be/hpnbkzWvQFw?is=BJJ2C2A6To_9l4nC

https://youtu.be/o99YP_L8_34?is=7uyilYLR7U20uzy_

冰花引領从2023年滾動至今, 自立陶宛首站开鑼。地球跑一圈, 第七站又回到原点。據說「七」是古代所有文明中最神圣的数字，被赋予「完整、幸運、圣潔」等象徵意義。故当走回該国備展时，滿以为老地方旧拍檔，定駕輕就熟。哼，到最后才见证何謂「行深见深」~ 又一趟打破常规的精彩绝倫。

过往於多國佈展，出发前Charles 必於心中預演一趟。可今回較特別，因他需於一週內在Ruta 的乡村实地創作。把憑空誕生的画作結合冰水同步展出，这是否意味着不少「未知知數」？我关心问：「初到贵境即要產八幅或更多画作來展覽，會有难度或受压嗎？」

他笑言：「戸外写生嘛, 全賴天时地利人和整體配合。放晴或打雷，全是老天爺說了算。 有压力否？你有贪有求、有得失心，压力自然來。」我搶腔：「就是啦！“听水说”联展，就在引領我们走着每步也該向伟大“水” 老師见贤思齐。水：自然随顺、溶入当下。 外緣怎呈現，学习水的柔軟、处下、灵活应对即可。水~不求掌聲、不恋讚美；只奉獻付出來成就整體。我们到哪办展也該不忘初心，這才是发揮水的特徵特性呵。」

而今回展覽得Ruta事前細心张羅，安排於立陶宛第二大城市「考納斯」的國家动物博物館之展庁进行。这逾百年博物館，想也沒想过能於此办展！前国家环保局局长 Ruta 的人脈与影響力，着实可见一斑。每当想到这难得礼遇，感激之情油然而生。可问题來啦：乡村完成創作后，需先在村內及附近展庁公展。翌日才趕赴考納斯。故只能於週六早上佈展、下午四时即开幕。这是 Ruta与馆长早計劃好的。

哎呀，佈展与开幕定作同一天？真逆料未及！虽我们算得上蛮有経验，但从没作实地堪察、且佈展时总有不少狀況；左右权衡下总觉不踏實。內在聲音一直鼓勵我「做真人」~把心中所想和盤托出。幸 Ruta体恤我这真心善意，最终跟馆长達成共悉。於週六佈展一天，週日下午才正式开幕。还好爭取到成功改期，因來到实地佈展才更覺...有这需要！

唉, 實情是這館長新官上任,對展廳不甚瞭解。礙於時間緊迫，男友有点发飙，我速安慰：「他新來的，啥也不熟，怪他無益。我们自己想办法好了。」結果，Charles、我与Ruta 登时幻化成「最強組合」。照片画作怎裱框、掛画的鈎怎固定、画与画间距怎测準、佈局怎雅观、燈光照明怎調整…Charles 当上总指揮，我与Ruta这小工拼命跟着办。

唏，作品要美名与打印标籖呀！不怕，我即場憑感覺命名，Ruta快手印标籖，我俩再合力剪贴一个个弄好。且慢，留言册、鮮花、开幕茶点呢？Ruta 一听速奔赴準備。多难得Ruta 从沒高官架子，全程齐心一起拼。一直从早上十時忙至傍晚五时才大功吿成。會場逛一圈，滿心讚嘆。不华丽浮誇，卻聚滿「爱心能量」之共振。倒是這「絲滑」般的合拍，更叫人萬般窩心！

到开幕日，一切漂亮开展。家长们携小孩看得着迷。正因是动物博物館，續后不少学校团体能观赏到璀璨冰花呢！真莫看輕这简单有愛開幕式，傍晚離去时点算一下：共展冰花十七张、已售七幅；十幅画作中 4幅名花有主！今回所有销售收益皆回馈Ruta的生態村,令这「听水說」联展更別具意义。

辛劳过后, 我仨會心微笑, 一切圆滿精彩。嗯, 第七站奔回立陶宛, 原來尽含深远宏旨 ~ 這美好的「愛心回归」, 濃濃愛意伴冰花&美画永留心中；暖暖的……真好!

附暖心視頻呵！❤️

https://youtu.be/hpnbkzWvQFw?is=Xc12rK6Ei009tYRa

https://youtu.be/o99YP_L8_34?is=bnIvL97d5dRzhVqB

“Pain. So much pain. Unbearable pain.” How can there be such excruciating pain in this world? It began as a vague sensation, as though something deep inside my organs were twisting and writhing. Then the force gradually intensified. Within just one or two breaths, it became like a sharp blade stabbing through me—twisting, pulling, tearing. My breathing grew rapid and chaotic. I felt I could not go on.
Charles looked at me. My eyes were vacant, my face ashen. He knew I was having another attack.

With what little breath I had left, I managed to say, “It hurts so much. I need to use the bathroom.” Then I rushed to the toilet.
I still remember that the toilet in the village house had a simple metal hook latch. The very moment I reached out to fasten it…
Everything went blank.
Total darkness. Not a sound. Absolute silence.
I have no idea how long time and space disappeared. When consciousness finally returned, I found myself curled up on the floor.
Ah… once again, that murderous pain had dragged me into shock.
I have suffered from this problem since childhood. Whenever the pain becomes unbearable, I simply lose consciousness and collapse. Since I never know how long I have been unconscious or where I have fallen, every time I come around, besides the pain throughout my body and the overwhelming weakness—as though every ounce of energy has suddenly been drained from me—there is also this strange inner fog: confusion, bewilderment and sadness.

Seeing me return, barely breathing, Charles said nothing. I collapsed onto the bed and closed my eyes. He touched my forehead. “Are you all right? You’re colder than ice…” Yes. Every time I come out of shock, I am drenched in sweat—great beads of cold sweat pouring from head to toe. I believe my body must be consuming enormous amounts of energy at that moment, desperately trying to repair itself and keep me alive.

Charles knows me well. He understands that all he needs to do is keep me warm. Wrapped in blankets, I could feel his large hands resting gently, again and again, on my cheeks, shoulders, arms and upper back.
At that moment, that warmth meant more than anything in the world. Every cell in my body seemed to be fighting for warmth, desperately grasping at it. Only when my frozen body gradually began to regain its temperature did he finally relax and reassure me:
“Don’t be afraid. Your temperature is back. The danger has passed.”
I had no strength even to open my eyes or respond. All I could do was silently give thanks for those warm hands that had supported me, holding me steady as I slowly, step by step, returned to life.

Sigh… truly, man proposes, but Heaven disposes. This sudden attack happened on the very day our Plein-air painting event came to an end. That evening, there was a group exhibition and a traditional folk-music performance. Yet just half an hour before the event began, I was suddenly forced to stop.
Charles looked at me with concern. "Why don’t I stay here with you…?" “No. You need to share your painting experience with the guests. I can rest here by myself.”

Charles went to the event as planned, while I quietly rested. Half asleep and half awake, I found myself thinking about the life of the great painter A.V.

So many of his words came back to me: “Painting is not simply about depicting the world we already know. It is a continuous journey of exploring the unknown. I love painting outdoors because everything is fleeting. Every creation is spontaneous—without rules, without formulas. It is freer. And this presence, this being fully present, comes closer to the ‘truth’ of nature.”
Lying there in bed, unable to attend the grand gathering, I felt deeply disappointed.
But why at this very moment? What deeper meaning might there be?
A.V. once said:
“Everyone is vulnerable. Yet vulnerability does not always appear in the form of tragedy. Sometimes it can be seen and understood anew through humour, even through the absurd. This is the belief at the heart of my work—to see truth in the absurd, and to touch the depths of life through playfulness.”

Honestly, after fainting countless times since childhood, this excruciating pain has taught me something about the very essence of life's fragility.
I often joke:
“There’s nothing much to fear. If I wake up after going into shock, I’m fine. If I don’t wake up, then it’s no longer my business.”
Life and death have never been mine to control. There is no point worrying about them.
What matters far more to me is this:
While I am alive, have I done my very best to make good use of this life?

Ah… suddenly I understood why that stabbing pain had struck.
Perhaps it had come simply to deliver a message through me:
A.V. was passionate about Plein-air painting precisely because he wanted to reveal how precious every single moment of life is. The present moment can never be repeated. The more we recognize the fragility of life and the unpredictability of the world, the more we should open our hearts and embrace Heaven and Earth.

Perhaps awakened by the pain, and deeply influenced by A.V., I suddenly had an impulse to ask Charles:
“I know your paintings are quite valuable. But what is more important—life or money?”
“You poor thing. Has the pain addled your brain? Of course life!”
“Exactly! Every painting we created in Ziboliškės village was inspired by A.V. and propelled by the energy of this place. Shouldn’t what we have created be given back? I suggest that the proceeds from the paintings created during this Plein-air event be donated to Ruta for the future expansion of the village. Let this beauty continue to grow and ripple outward.” Charles looked into my determined eyes—and agreed. ✌️

Life is about giving and contributing.
To be alive, to breathe freely, to be able to share and do something for the world—that alone is the greatest joy of being alive. There is no second prize.
I am grateful for the pain.
Grateful for A.V.
Grateful for every guidance that has brought me here.
And once again, I have been set ablaze with life.

(To be continued)

「痛、很痛、超級痛」，世上怎有如斯劇痛？開始時只隱約哪臟腑鑽呀鑽在扭動，漸拉力加強。不到一兩回呼吸即如利刃刺，扭呀扯呀、呼吸急促亂竄，快不行了。男友看我目光呆滯、臉如死灰，他知我又犯病了。

我只能用最后一口气吐話：「好痛，要上廁所。」一个急步衝洗手間去。還記得村屋厕所是用鐵勾上扣这种，拿扣在勾的当下......断片！一下子全漆黑一团、哑雀无聲，一片死寂！不知時空停頓多久, 至有覺知時, 我已捲縮地上。喔, 原來我又一趟被這奪命疼痛拖至「休克」境地。唉，從小這毛病，一痛再痛就直接「沒知覺」倒下。由於每回也不曉得休克多久、倒在哪, 故當知覺回來，除了全身痛、整個人像瞬間被抽空般虛弱乏力外, 便是內心一片混鈍、茫然與難過！

男友見我氣若如絲回來, 二話不說癱睡床上、雙目緊閉。他摸我額：「沒事嗎? 你比冰...還冷」是的, 每回休克, 醒來渾身是汗、是從頭至腳冒著豆大冷汗。相信當下身體在极速耗能來搶修、活命呢。懂我男友知道只要持續給我補暖即可。除了裹毛毯,一下一下感受到他大手擱我面頰、肩膀、手臂、上背。當時這暖比一切一切重要！身體每個細胞在搶暖,是拼命搶這種。直至僵凍身體漸喚回體溫,他才放心安慰曰：「不用怕, 體溫已回、危險期過了！」全程沒力氣睜眼及表態的我只深深鳴謝這暖手支撐我生命...一步一步走回來！

哼, 真是人算不如天算。這突襲發生在寫生結束當天, 於傍晚有共展活動與傳統民謠表演呢。竟在開鑼前半小時我忽被按停。男友關心曰：「倒不如我在這陪你….」「不行,你要跟來賓分享作畫心得, 我獨自休息便是了。」

Charles 如期赴會,我即靜心休養。半睡半醒中, 憶及大畫家A.V.的生平。他不少分享言猶在耳：「 繪畫並不是單純地描繪已知世界,而是不斷探索未知的旅程。我鍾情戶外寫生, 因一切稍縱即逝。每一創作皆即興、沒規格沒章法；這更自由、這臨在才接近“真實”的大自然！」

躺床上的我沒能出席盛會,深感遺憾。但何故是此時此刻？內藏啥深義？A.V.曾說：「人皆脆弱，這脆弱有時並不以悲劇面貌出現,反而可透過幽默甚至怪誕形式,被重新觀看與理解。這正是我創作中的信念~ 在荒謬中見真實，在戲謔中觸碰生命深處。」

坦白說，從小到大暈倒無數次，這鑽心痛叫人參透生命脆弱的本質。我常笑曰：「沒啥好怕。休克後能醒來則沒事、醒不來則沒我的事。生死從不是我的事，想多無益。我倒更在意存活當下有否盡心盡力把生命用好？」

唏, 秒懂何故突發鑽心痛, 无非借我传要旨：A.V.醉心戶外写生, 只为突显生命每一当下的彌足珍貴。 当下不能重來！越感人生脆弱、世事莫測，越需放开胸怀、擁抱天地呢！

也许受疼痛敲醒,加上深受A.V.影響。忽爾心血來潮问男友：「我知你每幅画作皆价值不菲，但...生命跟金錢哪要紧？」他笑回：「傻瓜是否痛懵了？當然是生命！」「今回在古村所有畫作無不受A.V.啟發與村莊能量的推動，產物好應回饋呀！我建議戶外寫生的賣畫收益，捐贈Ruta作日後村莊擴建之用。讓這美好持續滾動下去。」Charles看我坚定眼神，同意啦！✌️

生命就是付出奉獻。能活着+ 顺暢呼吸，我可分享、可为世界做点什麼，就已是存活最大的喜悅，沒有之二啦！感恩疼痛、感恩A.V.、感恩一切之引領，我又重燃开来咯！

（下回續）

For someone like me who has never really understood painting, I have always looked upon painters with nothing but admiration and envy. How on earth can they take an object, an image, or a person and, with just a few strokes of the brush and touches of color, bring the subject so vividly to life on canvas? What kind of secret magic do they possess?
Even though I have a boyfriend, Charles who has spent his entire life painting, I have never seriously asked him about it. Yet, somehow, after learning about the noble artistic spirit of Lithuania’s great painter A.V. and the way he devoted his entire life to painting, I suddenly felt that, deep down, these artists share the same quality of purity and innocence—as if they were born simply to do one thing well: paint!

Perhaps this is precisely the gift of fate that brought artists from different parts of the world together in this ancient village. It has allowed me to glimpse something I had never noticed before. Each artist has a completely different way of observing, capturing, and expressing what lies before them. But perhaps what matters most is not the finished painting at all. What truly captivates me is the artist’s state of mind when facing the scene—the countless ways in which body and mind become one while they are “in motion,” creating.
Every now and then, I would see Charles sitting as still as a plaster statue. After more than ten minutes, I could not help asking, “Are you all right? Are you meditating?”
“Madam, creation requires thinking! It’s certainly not a matter of standing in front of a canvas and everything magically falling into place. You know nothing about this, so please don’t disturb me!”
Hmm… I suppose this must be what they call an artist’s temperament!
That immediately reminded me of the past few days I had spent deeply immersed in reading about A.V.’s life and his philosophy of painting...

A.V. emphasized that when creativity first emerges and inspiration suddenly bursts forth, “There is nothing outside the mind; the whole person becomes completely immersed in it. Every painter encounters moments of pain and struggle, especially when painting outdoors in nature. When something feels wrong during the process of expression, it means that the structure may have a problem, and the work must be repainted or radically changed. At such a moment, he asked: “Are you willing to let go?”
Not a single brushstroke should ever be made carelessly."
Hearing the master’s profound words, I began to understand just how difficult it must be to be a painter like Charles.

But why was A.V. so deeply drawn to this ancient village?
Ruta did not elaborate. Perhaps she was leaving me more room to discover the answer for myself. How lovely it is that whenever something occupies the heart, the answer often comes quietly drifting in on its own.

One morning, we went to a neighbor’s home for breakfast. Everything was homemade, with fresh produce picked straight from the backyard—naturally delicious and full of life.
The old objects scattered around the dining room, in the corners and along the walls, were steeped in an ancient atmosphere that fascinated me. After breakfast, our hostess, Juste, enthusiastically began explaining everything to us.
With a playful smile, she first asked, “Do you know where linen comes from? What do you think these tools hanging on the wall were used for? And how old do you think this house is?”
Faced with such questions, I could only shake my head in complete ignorance.
Patiently, Juste gave us a fascinating little lesson.
“The little blue flowers growing in the backyard are flax plants. After harvesting, the flax is bundled up and dried. It is then processed with special tools, and repeatedly pulled through this large, needle-like comb. After that, the fibers are attached to this spinning wheel, spun into thread, and eventually woven into cloth…”
One single plant, she explained, could be used in its entirety. What an extraordinary example of sustainability and respect for nature!
Listening with half understanding, I asked, “Is it something like the traditional weaving methods used in ancient China?”
She burst out laughing.
“Yes... something like that! This house was left by my grandparents. In the old days, this dining room was actually where the livestock lived. Right where you are standing, there used to be cows and pigs. Over there were several sheep, and chickens too…”
My eyes lit up with delight.
“How wonderful! People here used to weave cloth and raise chickens all under the same roof. You can almost still breathe in the atmosphere of those days.”
The warm, rich energy I felt was not merely nostalgia. It was the deep, enduring atmosphere of a family that had lived here for generations—the love and warmth that had seeped into the very wood of the house. It felt like the loving protection passed down from one generation to the next.
Juste then took us around to see the stove from her grandmother’s time, the chimney, the well, the linen textiles, and various other old household objects. Every single item looked like an exhibit in a museum.
In fact, every home in this ancient village seemed to be a living testimony to history. Even an elderly grandmother simply standing outside her doorway could become a beautiful scene in itself. There was an abundance of subjects and inspiration everywhere.
I began to understand why a great painter like A.V. was so attracted to this place.

Just as I stood there gazing in amazement, Charles suddenly became as excited as a child. “No wonder every corner here is breathtaking! Look at this light—the way it slants across the scene, bringing out such a lively, vibrant character! And look at the tree and its shadow… Quick! The sun won’t wait. I have to get this onto the canvas before the light changes. No time to talk!”
Before I could even respond, he had already dashed off to fetch his painting gear. That, I suppose, is the professional attitude of a painter!

How grateful I am that this ancient village has opened my eyes and taught me so much.
I finally began to understand that beauty grows where there is love for a home and a piece of land. It quietly emerges without our noticing, and then, almost imperceptibly, is brought into being through someone’s hands. Wave after wave, it continues to unfold; generation after generation, it continues to be passed on.
How wondrous. How truly wondrous!

Charles worked intensely throughout that one week and completed ten paintings. He chuckled to himself: “I honestly never imagined I would end up with ten paintings.” I quickly chimed in, “Did it feel as though you had some Divine help?”
He simply smiled without answering.

So I added, “Perhaps it was because I have been consulting the great painter A.V. from afar every single day. Surely some of his invisible support must have rubbed off on you!”
From the bottom of my heart, I am grateful for A.V.’s invisible guidance. It feels as though, all this time, I had never truly noticed how to capture the beauty of life. Ah… and isn’t that about far more than painting?